a visit to see mom

While on spring break, we rode south to visit my parents in Florida. I don't usually talk to much about my mom, but once in a while, I think I need to for therapy.
Last week we got the diagnosis we all have known in the back of our heads, but dreaded to officially hear: advanced stage of Alzheimer's. Seeing it on paper, and hearing it from her doctor...rocked my dads world.
Because my mom has always been fearful of legal dealings, such as POAs, and Medical Surrogates. So, with my sister and I by Dads side we met last week with an attorney. We are petitioning the court for moms guardianship, this way he  can legally place her in a home, that will meet her needs and get her the help she consistently denies. She has only gone to the doctor twice in the past year, and we had to lie to get her to those appointments. So, it will be fight, as the mere mention of a doctors appointment or someone coming to the house arouses her aggression.
Something new is her constant sleeping, and in a daze of sorts. Last week she just sat there, disengaged, and staring past us into emptiness.


 I never thought I would see my mom like this, I mean what kid would?  When we had the boys, she was over the moon about them, they were her world, now she had nothing to do with them, and was wanting them to leave.

It hurts like hell and I hate how this horrible disease robs the patient of their life. All we do is pray for mom that God will intervene and relieve her of this mental torment and call her home.
( is that bad to ask for? )


JUGM

End of a Long Week

I will be happy for the weekend. Sunday morning we leave for the South Carolina Estate for Spring Break..This week has been long and rough for me and my family. Dad is still in the hospital. Yesterday was the needle aspiration - 1-2 gallons of fluid was extracted, then he was started on Lasix. Since Tuesday he has now dropped almost 40 pounds.  WOW!

While he is feeling much better, he is having a potassium issue and for that reason they want to keep him hospitalized at least for tomorrow, but possibly until Sunday. This water retention problem will come back, the cirrhosis has grown more intense. Ultimately he will need a liver transplant, but my father because of his age, has all ready told us he will decline it.

I called the Foundation for Alzheimer's and Dementia to get some information in reference to my mom. Lots of prayers will be needed for this, as we start the dreaded journey down the road to obtain an evaluation and help for her.

Again, THANK YOU ALL for the prayers, love and support- it means more to me and my family then you will ever know.. 

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Today was beautiful here, I desired some much needed therapy so I grabbed my camera and prior to getting the boys from school I drove around a bit and took some pics.
Have I told you  lately how much I love black and white? 




This farmhouse is on the way to school- I  have always liked it
 



I pass this train car every day- I think it has lots of character

I like the way this branch hangs over this small creek



A old house turned into an antique store-


 

Update on My Dad...

First off  THANK YOU all for the prayers.. I could feel the warmth from all the concern and love expressed for my family yesterday.

Dad is in the hospital for at least a couple of days. He has approx. a 1-2 gallons of fluid built up in his abdomen, which is causing extreme pain and is pressing against his heart and lungs. The X-rays showed his lungs were clear, so that is a good sign. T
His doctor is using medication to help relieve him of the fluid, and it is starting to work. But, they are also going to do a needle aspiration to draw the fluid out. Also his platelet count is VERY low...today it was 39.
He suffers from Cirrhosis of the liver, and the doctors believe it has grown worse. It was interesting because the admitting doctor lifted Dads shirt, and showed us red blotches across his stomach, and he told us that was a sign of increased Cirrhosis. Plus Dad looks incredibly jaundiced, and his skin is very dehydrated and cold.

My brother flew in from Seattle to be here, mainly for my dad. But also because he is the one person  my mother will listen to.
If there is any good news from this, it is that Dad, yesterday admitted my mother is having problems, and needs some sort of evaluation for her mental abilities. For so long, he has denied anything was wrong, but her behavior yesterday opened his eyes to the fact that indeed something is not right.

It is sad for me, to see both my parents at the same time like this  How does one deal with this? I have one parent declining medically and the other mentally. It is hard to watch the daily deterioration of my mother. She was also so well kept, and her house was immaculate.
Now, she is the complete opposite, she has removed her self from society and all she wants to do is stay in their house, talking to her you would think she is a 4-5 year old..it is as if she is regressing in age.   It is really tough and makes me very emotional.

I have my Senior and my boys there for support they are wonderful and I am truly blessed to be loved so much. . If anyone knows how I am feeling it is Senior-he has lost both his parents, and my beam of support. His strong arms give me security. I know I have all of you as well, you are all a second family--So thank you again.

-JUGM